The Best Christmas Gift Ever
Guess what I got for Christmas? A stocking full of hot flashes. Thank you Santa! Being only 43, I think this is some sort of cruel joke. At first I thought the rise in temperature was just the effects of global warming. But then I remembered global warming was happening outdoors, not in my clothes. Possible relief? Well, I'm thinking of throwing on a pair of Depends and filling them with ice. Maybe streaking thorough my backyard at night in the snow would be both fun and helpful. And oh joy, oh joy - I just read that this 'transition' usually starts several years before the actual event and lasts an average of 4 years but can continue for as long as 10. I could get another college degree in that time. While I'm in prison. Because PMS for me now stands for Pass My Shotgun. If this is just the opening act, I can't wait for the main attraction. Now if you would please excuse me, I have to go throw on a pair of shorts and a t-shirt.