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You know what's a pain in the ass? Shredding bills and bank statements. It's time consuming, it's messy, and one box of paper creates three trash bags full of 1.5 inch X .3 inch paper strips. I want my bills to now be sent on cheese. That way when I shred them, I can at least at do something with the by-product. Put it on a sandwich, throw it on some pasta, toss it on top of some corn chips - all of which is better than trying to shove 20 pounds of paper into a trash bag meant to hold no more than 10 pounds. Great nachos CJ! Why thank you. That's my electric bill you are eating. I shred everything. Cable bill? Shred that bad boy. Don't need anyone seeing what extras I rented (don't judge!). Phone bills? What if someone finds my itemized statement and starts crank calling my relatives? Shred it too! Retirement statements? No one has to know I need to work for another 70 years. Shred, shred, shred! Amazon receipts? Ohhhh no. None of your bees wax. Yes, I
I peed on my pants leg today at work. I'm a squatter. I know sitting on a public toilet will probably not bring me irreparable harm, but it just skeeves me to no end. Hovering can be tricky business however - one rogue stream as I had today and you've got yourself a pair of pee pee pants. Luckily this happened at the end of the day. It did prolong my day however, as I wanted to sit at my desk for a bit, hoping the spot would fade prior to my leaving the building. And, as it turns out, it was a particularly crowded day on the campus, with students moving in for the fall semester. Hopefully no one noticed as I quickly walked behind the buildings to the parking lot, glancing behind and down as I walked to make sure the offending spot was not standing out too much. Maybe I should keep a spare pair of pants in my office from now on.