Not so straight up with a twist, a dose of irreverent nonsense awaits.
The Story Of The Little Bird
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Birdie, birdie, on my pool gate you sit.
You and your mate, you peep and you flit.
But when I shouted shoo,
You dropped some more poo,
And now my patio is all covered with shit.
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Comments
Blondie said…
You can say that again!! The birds just LOVE to sit on our pool fence and poop on our patio! I wish I knew of a secret way to send them to our neighbors house who feeds them. Let them poop where they eat. I don't care! I just want them to stop pooping in our yard!
That was brilliant! No seriously, I have pooping birds, but not right now, right now I have 6 or more inches of snow on my deck, covering up plant stands, trikes, bikes and BBQs. Make it stop and I'll take little pooping birds, I swear I will!
Hey Blondie - Seems like the birds are smart enough not to poop in the yard where they are fed.
Thank you Lesbo! These little ones sit on my gate almost every morning.
Hi Lilligirl - Neither of those situations is good. Hope they at least leave you a little bit of seed.
Hey A - That is cool. Hope they are not messing up your stoop with poop.
Hi OC - Let's see, bird poop vs snow. I think I'll stick with the poop. Sorry about that. You know I think you're the best and everything, but I can't handle any more snow this year! Love the word verification!
Anonymous said…
Poor little thing. It looks like a baby. Have pity! (giggle)
Heading back to Boston after a fun day in Ptown. We met Beverly Leslie (Leslie Jordan) from Will And Grace. Pics on Facebook to follow! - Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone Location: United States
I peed on my pants leg today at work. I'm a squatter. I know sitting on a public toilet will probably not bring me irreparable harm, but it just skeeves me to no end. Hovering can be tricky business however - one rogue stream as I had today and you've got yourself a pair of pee pee pants. Luckily this happened at the end of the day. It did prolong my day however, as I wanted to sit at my desk for a bit, hoping the spot would fade prior to my leaving the building. And, as it turns out, it was a particularly crowded day on the campus, with students moving in for the fall semester. Hopefully no one noticed as I quickly walked behind the buildings to the parking lot, glancing behind and down as I walked to make sure the offending spot was not standing out too much. Maybe I should keep a spare pair of pants in my office from now on.
Up until last night, I thought I had tried everything. Dishwashing soap, dental floss, olive oil, two different kinds of hand lotion, ice, and Windex. I was just about to give up. However, my friends McMeaty and McCheesy were not. First came the WD-40 and lots of tugging. Standing over the kitchen sink, McMeaty gave it his all. Unfortunately the WD-40 not only lubed up my finger but his entire hand as well. No go there. Next came the dental floss. But the hand cream I had put on after the WD-40 only made the floss slip right off my finger without moving the ring. At this point, I had been sitting on the couch with my arm elevated for about ten minutes or so. This made the swelling go down quite a bit (thank you Chewy ). McMeaty was confident between the hand lotion and the reduction in swelling that another few pulls and twists would work. I sat on the couch, arm still elevated, while he patiently moved the ring up to my knuckle. Then wth a few more twists, turns, and tugging, the rin
Comments
you are brilliant!
love this!
My word verification sounds naughty:
pudedi
Thank you Lesbo! These little ones sit on my gate almost every morning.
Hi Lilligirl - Neither of those situations is good. Hope they at least leave you a little bit of seed.
Hey A - That is cool. Hope they are not messing up your stoop with poop.
Hi OC - Let's see, bird poop vs snow. I think I'll stick with the poop. Sorry about that. You know I think you're the best and everything, but I can't handle any more snow this year! Love the word verification!
Shawn
(long time lurker.. would like to continue lurking)