Bad Cow Sneeze
Did you know that when a cow sneezes, it can shoot cow boogies, with great accuracy, a distance of over four feet? Neither did I. Good thing I kept that extra napkin. Will somebody wipe this poor cow's nose please?
The Ring, Part 2
Up until last night, I thought I had tried everything. Dishwashing soap, dental floss, olive oil, two different kinds of hand lotion, ice, and Windex. I was just about to give up. However, my friends McMeaty and McCheesy were not. First came the WD-40 and lots of tugging. Standing over the kitchen sink, McMeaty gave it his all. Unfortunately the WD-40 not only lubed up my finger but his entire hand as well. No go there. Next came the dental floss. But the hand cream I had put on after the WD-40 only made the floss slip right off my finger without moving the ring. At this point, I had been sitting on the couch with my arm elevated for about ten minutes or so. This made the swelling go down quite a bit (thank you Chewy ). McMeaty was confident between the hand lotion and the reduction in swelling that another few pulls and twists would work. I sat on the couch, arm still elevated, while he patiently moved the ring up to my knuckle. Then wth a few more twists, turns, and tugging, the rin
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