Last Minute Holiday Shopping Guide

1. Secure yourself good parking by circling the mall chanting "Parking Mojo, Parking Mojo." This will help you to find a spot close to an entrance. Keep your middle finger at the ready just in case. Mall parking knows no holiday spirit.

2. Once inside, head right to one of the large department stores. It's pretty much a given that they will be having sales on everything from kitchen products to sweaters. Then convince yourself that you have found the perfect gift, even if you know it is something the recipient won't really like. They are lucky you are buying them anything.

3. Take your purchases and yourself to the nearest restaurant in the mall. Belly up to the bar, throw your bags on the floor and order a tall one. This is your gift to yourself for venturing out to the mall when you could have just been relaxing on the couch. The taller the beer, the better the shopping experience.


Anonymous said…
That's the way to get shopping done!
Anonymous said…
I'll just meet you at the bar.
Ronia Nash said…
The picture of you two at the bar makes the entire write up! ha ha
By the way, your truck is really clean!
lesbo said…
hell YES!
a drink after holiday shopping is a must-have.
Nulaanne said…
OMG! I use to go shopping at that mall.
I'll have to take your word for it...I hate going to the Mall this time of year!
SquirtyB said…
That is too funny! Cheers!
C.I.W. said…
I get Mall-itis. I can't even go near one without breaking into a rash.

get me an order of onion rings and a beer. see you gals and jude there.. :)

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