Toys For Tw*ts

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I received a holiday catalog from a country store north of Massachusetts. I won't say the state, because I don't typically like to name businesses, unless of course they make a good vodka or micro-brew.

I was excited to take a peak at it today. Nothing like a big picture of Santa on a country store catalog to stir up a little holiday spirit. Cozy nightgowns,cakes, candies, toys, and wait....what's this.....oh my.... an intimate massager in several different styles including discrete delight and dual pleasure?! Imagine my shock and surprise when I came across (no pun intended) that little jewel when all I wanted was some maple syrup. And to think I was going to let my Mother borrow this catalog. Well, she can't have it now. It's mine.

Comments

FemmeFairyGodmother said…
Send me a pumpkin & some cookies & I will send you some yummy yummy maple syrup! :) And PS? I *love* your comment heading there. So cute.
October 20, 2009 at 8:43 PM
Martini Cartwheels said…
What was that FFG? I couldn't hear you. I was on the phone placing an order. Thanks for the nice comment.
October 20, 2009 at 9:28 PM
Ellie Creek Ellis said…
i call those (and i got one the other day, too!) the "bunch-o'-junk-that no one needs-catalogue!

as far as the "special" toys...well, lets just say...WOOHOO!
October 20, 2009 at 11:12 PM
Rita said…
Here in portugal they have the same catalogs with everything from pots and pans to clothes and shoes.... but they call the .. hum.. toys.. facial massager.
They even have a picture of a very well behaved model holding it to her cheek... :)
October 21, 2009 at 6:55 AM
Anonymous said…
Are you pulling my leg? I thought those country stores were wholesome family shops. I'm guessing the um... are the pleasure items are shaped to look like corn on the cob? (wink) Does the catalog have the game called "Corn Hole"? (tee-hee)
October 21, 2009 at 9:51 AM
Allison said…
If I'm thinking of the same general store, they introduced those items a year or two ago to much criticism and many nastygrams...and still decided to keep them. Healthy living and all.
October 21, 2009 at 11:09 AM
Solo said…
www.babeland.com

You can thank me later.
October 22, 2009 at 2:00 AM
Martini Cartwheels said…
Hey Ms. Creek! You know, this would have been an ok catalog if it wasn't for the distraction. It really kind of surprised me.

Hi Rita! Thanks for stopping by. That is funny. I love the names they have for these products. Facial massager - classic.

Chewy I am not making this up. I didn't see any corn themed toys or games but I think that is a great idea! That's funny.

Hey Allison - They did have a disclaimer on the page explaining why they were selling the products. Well, good for them for sticking to their guns.

LMAO Solo. Thanks for the link.
October 22, 2009 at 9:41 PM
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