Monday, April 29, 2013

Lower Your Cholesterol 60 Points In Six Months!

By making minor lifestyle changes, I dropped my cholesterol level 60 points in 6 months. For example, I stopped buying potato chips which thereby prevented me from shoving handfuls of them in my mouth every night like I was going to the electric chair.

Here are some other tips:
  • Eat oatmeal every day until it starts to come out your ears.
  • Take fish oil pills.
  • Replace slices of cheese on your sandwich with bottles of beer. Two or three Sam Adams and you won't give a shit there is no cheese on your ham sandwich.
  • Honey and cinnamon tea. I read that in combination these can lower your cholesterol. Just don't do that stupid cinnamon challenge thing where you try to eat a teaspoon of it dry within one minute. It doesn't matter what your cholesterol is if you can't freaking breathe. And don't be cheap. Buy the good honey, the organic unpasteurized kind with the bee wings and legs. 
  • Exercise. Put your treadmill or exercise bike in front of a television and watch something scary and creepy like The Walking Dead. You'll run or pedal faster trying to get away from the zombies on the screen.
Try the above tips. And if they work, you can send me the $29.99 you were going to spend on that book that was supposed to help you achieve a healthier cholesterol level.






2 comments:

Taradharma said...

good on you! No meds!

CJ said...

Hey thanks Tara! At least not for now. It's so hard to be good.